'Til My Sides Hurt

This is a list of the funny and hilarious things my kids have said in the past and recently. I plan to update it when they give me more material.

6-18-09 Abiah 6yrs, Amelia 5 months

Abiah was looking for something on top of the microwave and when I told him to find it he said, "I can't. My neck's too short." Then he was talking to Amelia who was kicking her legs, waving her arms and grinning and he said, "Millie, slow down your happiness." When I told him she couldn't he said, "Uh, huh. That's what you told me when I was a baby."


6-17-09 Hazel 20 months

Nathan and I were discussing how little the girls were sleeping and how cranky they had been the day before and I said, "They're ganging up on us!" and Hazel shook her head yes. Then Nathan said, "It's a conspiracy!" and Hazel shook her head yes.


4-13-09 Abiah 5 yrs

Mom: "Abiah, what does it sound like when I say C-A-T?"

Abiah: "Uhhhmmm, Alaska?"


Hazel 18 months

I was dressing Hazel and i put a shirt on her that had tiny, blue rosettes all over it. She said, "Mom, mom," and pointed to the flower and said, "Bzzzzzz."


3-21-09 Abiah 5 years

I told Abiah that I really enjoyed a spinach pie my mom had made and this was the conversation that followed:

Mom: "Did you like the pie?"

Abiah: "Yes, I did."
Puppy (interpreted by Abiah): "Me too!"

Abiah: "Puppy, you didn't have any spinach pie."

Abiah (to Mom): "She was confused because she had pumpkin pie yesternight."

Mom: "Pumpkin Pie!?! Did Puppy bring me any pie?"

Abiah: "You know puppy's a stuffed animal don't you?"


Abiah 5 years

After my gall bladder removal surgery the Dr's bills were pilling up and Nathan needed to work some overtime to help us through. During a discussion about why we were waiting to go grocery shopping Abiah told me, "Mom, you should have stayed yellow for a little longer so dad could have saved money to pay the doctors."


Abiah 5 years

Abiah was pulling Hazel around in a laundry basket. After working very hard for a few minutes and not moving far he exclaimed, "It would be easier if this chubby munchin (munchkin) wasn't in here!"


Abiah 5 years

Abiah told Uncle Summer, "My dad says I can't work at the same Safeway Milk Plant as him. I'm gonna tell his boss that he does bad things so he'll get fired and then I can have his job."


2-23-09 Abiah 5 years

Abiah head been waiting for me to read to him all day. Finally we were gonna read but Amelia started crying. I was shooshing her, trying to calm her when he asked, "Mom, if you had two mouths could you shoosh Amelia and read at the same time?"


2-23-09 Abiah 5 years

"Mom, your butt is bigger than daddy's. When he sits on me it doesn't squish me but it would if you did. I think Hazel has a butt like you."


Abiah 5 years Hazel 15 months

Abiah and Hazel are at the table with Nathan eating breakfast and Hazel is whinning because she wants Nathan to hurry. Abiah turned to her and said, "Hazel, you aren't the only one in the family." Hazel looked at him with a confused look and said, "huh!"


11-16-08 Abiah 5 years Hazel 12 months

Hazel was in the kitchen with me and I saw she was trying to eat something black that was in her hands. When I looked closer I found it was an ant. As I was taking it away from her Abiah came in and asked what was going on. I told him and he said, "Maybe she's hungry."


Abiah 5 years

"Thank you for this dinner, Maga. But it's not very good."


Abiah 5 years

Abiah is calling bummble bees, "Humble bees".


Abiah 4 years

Sitting with a blanket over his head he exclaimed, "Look mom! I'm a princess!"


Abiah 4 years

"We have a peeing mattress!" (praying mantis)


8-20-07 Abiah 4 years

"I don't want to take a bath. I want to be a filth."


7-31-07 Abiah 4 years

Abiah: "Mom, where's my bow (as in bow and arrow)?"

Mom: "I don't know."

Abiah: "I need to so I can tie my ears up."

He was thinking of the song:
Do your ears hang low
Do they wobble to and fro
Can you tie them in a knot
Can you tie them in a bow


7-30-07 Abiah 4 years

Abiah: "Mom, when I get older maybe I can have a girlfriend or something."

Mom: "How old should you be?"

Abiah: "5?"